Thursday, March 09, 2006

Chuck Norris Facts you don't want to miss!

When I opened my e-mail this morning I was greeted by the same plethora of e-mails I recieve everyday. They are always funny and keep me on my toes, that is what happens when you have really funny friends who want to be writers. Today I got one from my friend Colin, who is a teacher at a University somewhere.

"Chuck Norris does not go hunting because the word hunting implies the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing."

One of my students just wrote this on the board and walked out of class after finishing his midterm exam. Is it from a movie or standup routine to anyones knowledge?

That is classic! That guy must have balls-of-steel to put that up on the board. I mean everyone knows that Chuck Norris is an amazing man, but to put that on the board after an exam, Awsome! I just hope that kid aced his midterm.

I started thinking about it though, what crazy things did I do when I was in college? Which brings me to the story of the day ladies and gentleman. Does anyone remember when Brittany Spears was huge? I'm not talking obese like now, more like when she No. 1. Yeah it's hard for me too. Well, McDonald's at that point in time was giving out something pertaining to her, for all I know it was a replica doll or something. My roomate from College Chris and I were moving into our new house and stopped their for lunch.

Now when your in College your kind of a clepto. Seriously all you people who attended a University will agree with me that if it was something you couldn't buy and wasn't nailed down(well, sometimes nailed down), but would make your house or apartment that much cooler, you would just take it. I know you all did, try to prove me wrong? For example; beer signs in bars, street signs, those straw dispensers, etc...

Anywho while taking all of our stuff out of storage we stopped across the street at a Mickey D's. Chris had his monster truck with him(it was really just a normal pickup). While waiting in line we both noticed the scantaly clad Britany Spears card board cutout next to the register. Well, Chris remarked, "Stickler I need to have that, it would look great in the new place." We both sat down at a table in a empty McDonald's and ate our lunch, Chris eyeing the cut out the whole time. Seriously it was starting to freak me out, his mind turning while looking at it so intently. As we got up to leave Chris throws the key's to his truck at me and says, "Hey, I gotta use the restroom. Go start the car and pull it up to the door!" I catch them midflight and say, "Ok!" I could tell something was about to go down. Roommates have that bond where they can read each other's minds at moments of great peril.

As I get into the truck I realize that it is stick and I don't know how to drive it. I start it though. All of a sudden Chris comes crashing out of the door with a large cardboard cut out of Brittany flailing in the wind over his head. I have never seen him hall more ass then in this instant. He is screaming something as he lofts her into the truck bed and jumps in the drivers seat. He then asks out of breath, "Dude! Why didn't you pull the truck around?" I say, "I don't know how to drive stick, are they chasing you?" We both look at the door to the restaurant, but no one has followed yet. Chris speeds off and get's stuck in traffic directly in front of the store. No one came after us though and for 2 years we shared our living room with Brittany!


Anonymous BLongly said...

I know firsthand that you did some crazier stuff than that in college. That's a good story, but still. The street signs, the trailer, 22 pitcher night, outdoor party during Little 5. All of those stand out a little more, don't you think?
Still, a good story.

March 09, 2006 5:31 PM  
Blogger Stickler said...

Don't worry at some point something will make me think of those stories and I will tell them in all their gorey details!

March 09, 2006 9:07 PM  
Blogger Steph said...

Oh noes! Not another Chucky fan!!

March 10, 2006 1:18 AM  
Blogger Stickler said...

Steph I love Chuck, but in a completely platonic sort of way!

March 10, 2006 11:57 PM  

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