Thursday, October 13, 2005

Look Ma, I'm all grows'd up!

One of the major problems with living with girls (I'm learning all about these now that I live with two of them, But don't get me wrong I love em' to death.) is that whenever I use the bathroom, I have to remember to put the seat lid down. From years and years of living with either male roommates or living at home where I just didn't care, this has never been an issue. But now that I am living with girls it is all I think about, constantly reminding myself as I drop the boys off at the pool or pee like their is tomorrow; "Don't Forget, Don't Forget!"

And it gets worse, because this breeds fear which leads to questioning "What if something rather large and unholy comes out and I back up the toilet." Oh no! It is becoming a recurring nightmare, I sh*t you not. My friend Jonah even had to leave the apartment to take care of his business!

Children of the world are lucky though. It used to be that all we had were potty training books, such as "Everyone Poops" my favorite, to teach us the ways of the toilet. I still use it as a reference when I get a little lost. And did you know that the makers of this wonderful book have continued the series and released another classic, "The Gas We Pass" . I have a bunch of friends who could use that one.

Anyways children of today are lucky though. They have all types of new fangled gadgets to assist them in their potty training exploits. From little plastic training toilets to the little buzzer that wakes you up when you are going to Pee yourself when you sleep. I was a successful graduate of the latter. Now they have gone an invented the greatest potty training device for young boys I have ever seen. It is called the Peter Potty; it is the world’s first and only flushable toddler urinal from Visionaire Products, Inc. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics,
"boys – on average – do not master potty training until after their third birthday, a full four months later than girls. The primary reason is the “stand up” factor: while most two-year-old boys have mastered the motor skills needed to lower their pants and underwear enough to stand, they don’t acquire the motor skills needed to lower their pants and underwear enough for a sitting potty until they are much older."

Now I can't remember how long it took me to learn this art, I'm sure my parents could tell you. But that is an amazing statistic! So all I know is that I want a Peter Potty. It has always been a dream of mine to have my very own urinal and now I can get one for cheap. In fact I don't think I know a single guy who wouldn't want one on of these. think about it, Your out drinking, you come home, you go to sleep, you wake up because you have to pee, and there in the corner of your room is your Peter Potty. Why should all the unpotty trained kids get to have all the fun?


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