Monday, September 19, 2005

floods in austria

funny story.

last week, second to last performance of The Sound of Music in Hangzhou, China.

End of the First Act, Party Scene.

Middle of 'So Long Far Well.'

Gretl can't hold it in any longer. A large stream of piss starts running down her legs, i first notice it as her pink suede shoes begin to change from light to dark. i nonchalantly begin to look toward teh rest of the cast/party guests hoping someone is aware of what is going on, and i'm not imagining this. Gretl slowly swishes her dress to allow the rest of teh piss to drip off her dress and backs up toward the stairs to sing 'the sun has gone to bed and so must i.' i can feel the terror begin to swell up in my body as i realize i have to pick her up and carry her up the stairs at the end of this song. i walk over to her, grab her hand and walk her to the stairs, all while taking in strong wiffs of piss smell and trying desperately not to break out into a hysterics. we get to the stairs, i hold her hand, i avoid eye contact with everyone on stage for fear of losing it, as does everyone on stage avoid eye contact with me as they grip onto eachother and pray that they will be able to make it through the rest of the scene without pissing themselves too! i do not sing the last lines of the song 'good bye' mostly cuz my shoulders are shaking horribly and all my efforts are spent on trying not to break down laughing. The song ends.. i pick gretl up, trying not to get piss all over my dress and my hands.. failing miserably, carry her up the stairs, and then let her down as soon as i have cleared the audience. the child rangler sees mary(gretl) and says 'mary what happened?' to which she cooly responds, 'i peed.' and proceeds to change her clothes and not once does she cry, not once is she embarrassed, but laughs the whole thing off like its the funniest fucking thing she's ever done.. working with six year olds is always a treat.. oh, live theatre.. ya never know what will happen next.



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